Killers - Joel The Lump Of Coal
Verse 1
D A/C# Bm A
Some time ago, at Santa's place up in the old North Pole
Em Bm E A
There lived a lump of anthracite whose parents called him Joel
D A Bm F#m
Joel, Joel, the lump of coal happy as a lump can be
G D G A
He just wants to keep Santa warm and make the elves cozy
D A/C# Bm A
But Santa Claus had other plans for Joel one fateful day
Em Bm E A
"Joel, you're just the lump I need come join me on my sleigh"
D A Bm F#m
Joel, Joel, the lump of coal heart leapt up with joy,
G D G A B7/D#
I'll soon be Santa's present to a lucky girl or boy
Bridge
Em D A G
We'll laugh and play together and hold each other tight
D A G D/F#
Snuggle under clean white sheets when we go to sleep at night
Em D A G
Then Santa's elves all laughed at Joel, "you're in for a surprise
D A G D/F#
You're not a special Christmas gift you're just a booby prize
Em D A G
What kid would ever want you? You're filthy as can be
D A G
Now you have to go and live with one who's been naughty"
D G E/G# A A#dim7 Bm
"But I make heat, poor Joel cried and electricity"
D7/C A7
"You pollute the air with CO2 and mercury"
Verse 2
D A Bm F#m
Joel, Joel, the lump of coal fell down upon his knees
G D G A
"I don't wanna live with a naughty kid don't make me, Santa, please"
D A/C# Bm A
But Santa laughed his jolly laugh, "Ho, Ho, you stupid lump
Em Bm E A
You're just the thing to teach this brat that Santa ain't no chump"
D A/C# Bm A
So off they flew and, before he knew Joel was in a sack
Em Bm E A
He cried and yelled to Santa Claus, "why don't we just go back?"
Bridge
Em D
And then came Christmas morning
A G
And, much to Joel's surprise (Much to Joel's surprise)
D A
He saw a boy with the saddest face
G D/F#
And tears were in his eyes (Tears were in his eyes)
Em D
He picked Joel up and held him
A G
And said, "you can be my friend (Hey man, let's be friends)
D A
I would've liked some presents but
G D/F#
You're what Santa chose to send (Santa chose to send)
Em D
It's true, I've been a naughty boy
A G
And maybe that's a sin (Maybe that's a sin)
D A G
If this is how Santa treats the kids, I'm just glad that I'm not him"
Verse 3
D A Bm F#m
Joel, Joel, the lump of coal knew what he must do
G D G A
He said, "now I know the reason why I got sent to you
D A/C# Bm A
Cause when a person hurts inside it turns him hard and cruel
Em Bm E A
But I know how to make your pain into a precious jewel"
D A/C# Bm A
"So take me in your hand, young man and squeeze with all your might
Em Bm E A
Let's turn your pain and anger into something that shines bright"
D A Bm F#m
Then Joel, Joel, the lump of coal he gave his life away
G D G A D
Oh, one good naughty little boy get a diamond on Christmas day
Outro (D) A |Bm F#m |G D |G A ||D
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